photo by: erica garlieb with my best friend in the world
I owe you all an explanation. It has been nearly a solid month since I blogged consistently. Truthfully, you guys are my friends, my readers, the people I feel most comfortable speaking candidly to and sharing myself with, and yet in the last month of uncertainty I pulled away. Allow me to explain.
Have you ever felt like everything in your life was inconsistent? Like you had no comfort, no continuity, and it paralyzed you? That is precisely how i’ve been feeling for quite some time now. In the last 75 days my whole world has shifted. Albeit for the better, I have moved apartments (into a gorgeous one, I might add), gotten a new roommate (whom i’m obsessed with), changed jobs (that has been more fulfilling than I could ever imagine), and ended a 4 year relationship that spanned my most formative years. Nothing has felt safe or comforting. I wake up somewhere that still doesn’t feel like home, walk a neighborhood that doesn’t feel like mine, and come home from a new office each day. Blogging was always my comfort. It was where I was able to express myself, dance around in front of a camera and show my true colors. But in the last few months it has felt scary. It has reminded me of a time that feels like so long ago. It felt exhausting, draining, like too much.
Frankly, the thought of sitting down and sharing myself with you guys when I felt so unstable was not something I could stand. Until now. I finally feel like I am under control, and i’ve accepted that while everything in my life changed at exactly the same time, that isn’t a bad thing. I’m strong, I can handle the change, and am very fortunate that every one was only for the better.
So, in short, i’m back! I don’t know what schedule I will be keeping just yet but I hope you’ll stick around for the ride. Thank you for all of your kind words, your emails/tweets/comments have meant so much.