This is my first time writing a post in nearly 2 years, and i’m terrified, excited, and hope you’re all eager to continue to join me on this journey.
I imagine everyone still following along is wondering where i’ve been. Well, since my last post i’ve: met a wonderful boy, moved in with him, had a scary medical experience (more on that below), gotten engaged and married. Phew! It’s been quite the 24 months.
I’d like to start out slow, putting one post in front of the other, seeing how I feel. This is a space i’ve loved for nearly five years, and i’m excited to be back to it, and to you.
But, before that, I want to share some words that I wrote just weeks after the most terrifying medical experience of my young life. Not to scare anyone or garner sympathy, but mostly because I want to remember my mindset and my thinking during that time. The words below are entirely unedited. They were composed during a time of recovery, when all I craved was to create. I never published these words or have shared them with anyone, until now.
I’m back ladies. Let’s do this.
Date: May 29, 2015
Today, I felt the urge to create. To write, to publish, to share and to get my feelings out on paper. Mostly, I felt the strongest urge to come back to this space, to share with you where life has taken me in the last year.
The biggest change is the one i’m currently in. I write now from inside a home, on a Friday at 1030am. I write with a terrible headache, with a stomach full of nerves and fear in my heart. But all the while, a great fullness to be typing and breathing and living.
3 weeks ago I suffered an intracerebral hemorrhage. I woke up in the middle of the night with a head pain unlike any i’d ever experienced. My loving, caring boyfriend rushed me to the ER and life changed forever. I was immediately admitted to the hospital and so began weeks of pain, recovery, doctors and terror. As one that has never so much as suffered from a broken bone, this level of medical intervention was, to say the least, terrifying.
I sit now 2 weeks into recovery, out of the hospital. I am walking, I am talking, I am thinking, I am loving and I am breathing. For all of these things I am eternally grateful. I will work again, I will travel again, I will get my day-to-day life back again, in due time.
For that I am eternally grateful.
For this space, I am grateful.
For the ability to create, I am grateful.
For you, I am grateful.
This space has given me so much in the last 3 years. It’s a place that allows me to feel ownership over something, to share what I wish to share with the world, to grow a passion i’ve always had, to find people like me, to relate. Thank you for that, thank you for being here.